| Ten Thoughts to Ponder Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day, teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 Some people are like a Slinky ... Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. Number 5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals, dying of nothing. Number 4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00, and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00? Number 2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. And The Number 1 Thought Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow. - - - and as someone recently said to me: "Don't worry about old age, it doesn't last long." | 
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