Saturday, April 25, 2009
United States subways are a dump compare to moscow
E-mail me at lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com and I will Mail you their subway photos
United States subways are a dump compare to Moscow
E-mail me at lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com and I will Mail you their subway photos.
Colonoscopy.
> ...I called my friend Andy Sable, a
> Gastroenterologist, to make an
> appointment for a Colonoscopy.
>
> A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a
> color diagram of the
> colon, a lengthy organ
>
> that appears to go all over the place, at one
> point passing briefly
> through Minneapolis .
>
> Then Andy explained the Colonoscopy procedure to me
> in a thorough,
> reassuring and patient manner.
>
> I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear
> anything he said, because
> my brain was shrieking, quote,
>
> 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP
> YOUR BEHIND !!!!'
>
> I left Andy's office with some written
> instructions, and a prescription
> for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes
> in a box large enough to hold
> a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail
> later;
> for now suffice it to say that we must never allow
> it to fall into the
> hands of America 's enemies .
>
> I spent the next several days productively sitting
> around being nervous .
> Then, on the day before my Colonoscopy, I began my
> preparation. In
> accordance with my instructions,
>
> I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had
> was chicken broth,
> which is basically water, only with less flavor.
>
> Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix
> two packets of powder
> together
>
> in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with
> lukewarm water.
> (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a
> liter is about 32
> gallons.)
just a hint of lemon.
>
> The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by
> somebody with a great
> sense of humor,
>
> state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery
> bowel movement may result.'
> This is kind of like saying that after you jump off
> your roof, you may
> experience contact with the ground.
>
> MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to
> be too graphic, here, but:
> Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch ?
>
> This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with
> you as the shuttle.
> There are times when you wish the commode had a seat
> belt.
> You spend several hours pretty much confined to the
> bathroom, spurting
> violently.
>
> You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure
> you must be totally
> empty,
>
> you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at
> which point, as far as I
> can tell,
>
> your bowels travel into the future and start
> eliminating food that you
> have not even eaten yet.
>
> After an action-packed evening, I finally got to
> sleep. The next morning
> my wife drove me to the clinic.
>
> I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about
> the procedure, but I had
> been experiencing
>
> occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage .
>
> I was thinking,'What if I spurt on Andy ?'
>
> How do you apologize to a friend for something like
> that ?
> Flowers would not be enough.
>
> At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging
> that I understood and
> totally agreed
> with whatever the heck the forms said.
>
> Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy
> people, where I went
> inside a
>
> little curtained space and took off my clothes and
> put on one of those
> hospital garments
>
> designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you
> put it on, makes you
> feel
>
> even more naked than when you are actually naked.
>
> Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a
> vein in my left hand.
> Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very
> good, and I was
> already lying down.
>
> Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in
> their MoviPrep.
> At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought
> of this,
> but then I pondered what would happen if you got
> yourself
> too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were
> staggering around in
> full " Fire Hose Mode . "
>
> You would have no choice but to burn your house.
>
> When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the
> procedure room,
> where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an
> anesthesiologist.
> I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy
> had it hidden around
> there somewhere.
>
> I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me
> roll over on my left
> side,
>
> and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up
> to the needle in my
> hand .
>
> There was music playing in the room, and I realized
> that the song was
> 'Dancing Queen' by Abba .
>
> I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could
> be playing during
> this particular procedure,
>
> 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least
> appropriate .
> 'You want me to turn it up ?' said Andy,
> from somewhere behind me .
>
> 'Ha ha,' I said . And then it was time, the
> moment I had been dreading
> for
>
> more than a decade . I f you are squeamish, prepare
> yourself,
> because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail,
> exactly what it was
> like .
>
> I have no idea . Really . I slept through it .
>
> One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen!
> Feel the beat from the
> tambourine .'
>
> and the next moment, I was back in the other room,
> waking up in a very
> mellow mood .
>
> Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I
> felt.
> I felt excellent.
>
> I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it
> was all
> over, and that my colon had passed with flying
> colors .
>
> I have never been prouder of an internal organ.
>
> ABOUT THE WRITER:
>
> Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor
> columnist for the Miami
> Herald.
>
> Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during
> exams were quite
> humorous......
>
> A physician claimed that the following are actual
> comments made by his
> patients
>
> (predominately male) before or after their
> colonoscopies :
>
> 1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going
> where no man has gone before !
>
> 2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet ?'
>
>
> 3. 'Can you hear me NOW ?'
>
>
> 4. 'Are we there yet ? Are we there yet ? Are
> we there yet ?'
>
> 5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now
> legally married.'
>
> 6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief ?'
>
>
> 7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your
> left hand out...'
>
>
> 8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels !'
>
>
> 9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit
> !'
>
> 10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my
> dignity.'
>
> 11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron,
> didn't you ?'
>
> 12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'
>
>
> 13. 'How far up did you go ? I now have a sore
> throat.'
> And the best one of all..
>
> 14. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying
> that my head is not up
> here ?
> Gastroenterologist, to make an
> appointment for a Colonoscopy.
>
> A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a
> color diagram of the
> colon, a lengthy organ
>
> that appears to go all over the place, at one
> point passing briefly
> through Minneapolis .
>
> Then Andy explained the Colonoscopy procedure to me
> in a thorough,
> reassuring and patient manner.
>
> I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear
> anything he said, because
> my brain was shrieking, quote,
>
> 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP
> YOUR BEHIND !!!!'
>
> I left Andy's office with some written
> instructions, and a prescription
> for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes
> in a box large enough to hold
> a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail
> later;
> for now suffice it to say that we must never allow
> it to fall into the
> hands of America 's enemies .
>
> I spent the next several days productively sitting
> around being nervous .
> Then, on the day before my Colonoscopy, I began my
> preparation. In
> accordance with my instructions,
>
> I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had
> was chicken broth,
> which is basically water, only with less flavor.
>
> Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix
> two packets of powder
> together
>
> in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with
> lukewarm water.
> (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a
> liter is about 32
> gallons.)
just a hint of lemon.
>
> The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by
> somebody with a great
> sense of humor,
>
> state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery
> bowel movement may result.'
> This is kind of like saying that after you jump off
> your roof, you may
> experience contact with the ground.
>
> MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to
> be too graphic, here, but:
> Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch ?
>
> This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with
> you as the shuttle.
> There are times when you wish the commode had a seat
> belt.
> You spend several hours pretty much confined to the
> bathroom, spurting
> violently.
>
> You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure
> you must be totally
> empty,
>
> you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at
> which point, as far as I
> can tell,
>
> your bowels travel into the future and start
> eliminating food that you
> have not even eaten yet.
>
> After an action-packed evening, I finally got to
> sleep. The next morning
> my wife drove me to the clinic.
>
> I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about
> the procedure, but I had
> been experiencing
>
> occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage .
>
> I was thinking,'What if I spurt on Andy ?'
>
> How do you apologize to a friend for something like
> that ?
> Flowers would not be enough.
>
> At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging
> that I understood and
> totally agreed
> with whatever the heck the forms said.
>
> Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy
> people, where I went
> inside a
>
> little curtained space and took off my clothes and
> put on one of those
> hospital garments
>
> designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you
> put it on, makes you
> feel
>
> even more naked than when you are actually naked.
>
> Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a
> vein in my left hand.
> Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very
> good, and I was
> already lying down.
>
> Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in
> their MoviPrep.
> At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought
> of this,
> but then I pondered what would happen if you got
> yourself
> too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were
> staggering around in
> full " Fire Hose Mode . "
>
> You would have no choice but to burn your house.
>
> When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the
> procedure room,
> where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an
> anesthesiologist.
> I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy
> had it hidden around
> there somewhere.
>
> I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me
> roll over on my left
> side,
>
> and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up
> to the needle in my
> hand .
>
> There was music playing in the room, and I realized
> that the song was
> 'Dancing Queen' by Abba .
>
> I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could
> be playing during
> this particular procedure,
>
> 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least
> appropriate .
> 'You want me to turn it up ?' said Andy,
> from somewhere behind me .
>
> 'Ha ha,' I said . And then it was time, the
> moment I had been dreading
> for
>
> more than a decade . I f you are squeamish, prepare
> yourself,
> because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail,
> exactly what it was
> like .
>
> I have no idea . Really . I slept through it .
>
> One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen!
> Feel the beat from the
> tambourine .'
>
> and the next moment, I was back in the other room,
> waking up in a very
> mellow mood .
>
> Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I
> felt.
> I felt excellent.
>
> I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it
> was all
> over, and that my colon had passed with flying
> colors .
>
> I have never been prouder of an internal organ.
>
> ABOUT THE WRITER:
>
> Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor
> columnist for the Miami
> Herald.
>
> Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during
> exams were quite
> humorous......
>
> A physician claimed that the following are actual
> comments made by his
> patients
>
> (predominately male) before or after their
> colonoscopies :
>
> 1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going
> where no man has gone before !
>
> 2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet ?'
>
>
> 3. 'Can you hear me NOW ?'
>
>
> 4. 'Are we there yet ? Are we there yet ? Are
> we there yet ?'
>
> 5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now
> legally married.'
>
> 6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief ?'
>
>
> 7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your
> left hand out...'
>
>
> 8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels !'
>
>
> 9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit
> !'
>
> 10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my
> dignity.'
>
> 11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron,
> didn't you ?'
>
> 12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'
>
>
> 13. 'How far up did you go ? I now have a sore
> throat.'
> And the best one of all..
>
> 14. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying
> that my head is not up
> here ?
Redneck Jokes
YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF...
Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines."
You think God looks a lot like Hank Williams, Jr., and heaven looks a lot like Daytona Beach, Florida.
You believe dual air bags refer to your wife and mother-in-law.
Your father executes the "pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
You were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 45's.
You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl'.
The people on Jerry Springer's show remind you of your neighbors.
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.
You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.
Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction.
You think subdivision is part of a math problem.
You think there's nothin wrong with incest as long as you keep it in the family.
You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.
You think the three primary colors are John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray.
Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart cause there is a law against it.
The beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.
You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.
You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
Your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin'.
You believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
You think genitalia is an Italian airline.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
You keep empty beer cans in your fridge for your friends that don't drink.
You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
You think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
You buy your jewelry at the hardware store.
Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are "Gentlemen, start your engines."
You think God looks a lot like Hank Williams, Jr., and heaven looks a lot like Daytona Beach, Florida.
You believe dual air bags refer to your wife and mother-in-law.
Your father executes the "pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
You were acquitted for murdering your first wife after she threw out your Elvis 45's.
You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl'.
The people on Jerry Springer's show remind you of your neighbors.
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.
You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.
Your sister is the third generation of women in your family to conceive a baby as a result of an alien abduction.
You think subdivision is part of a math problem.
You think there's nothin wrong with incest as long as you keep it in the family.
You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.
You think the three primary colors are John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray.
Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart cause there is a law against it.
The beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.
You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.
You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
Your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin'.
You believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
You think genitalia is an Italian airline.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
You keep empty beer cans in your fridge for your friends that don't drink.
You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
You think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
You buy your jewelry at the hardware store.
TRUST ME... I'M A LAWYER
Lawyer: "Judge, I wish to appeal my client's case on the basis of newly discovered evidence."
Judge: "And what is the nature of the new evidence?"
Lawyer: "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left."
Judge: "And what is the nature of the new evidence?"
Lawyer: "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left."
Friday, April 24, 2009
Herbicides
Herbicides are still being sprayed in Lake Ashton says Southwest Florida Water Management District Tel 863-534-1448 . Last year I put a stop on the use of Herbicides in Lake Ashton. The Development group,LLC somehow got permission to use Herbicides again. Call "Do Nothing" Joe Hunter and speak your Mind. 324-5457 I give up! No one here at Lake Ashton dares to do anything for fears of reprisal. What are you afraid of? Thank-you
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Sad News
David Fuller of Aberdeen Lane had a stroke at the Lake Ashton HFC on Monday and fell to the floor and hit is head. He was rush by ambulance to Lakeland hospital, unfortunately a helicopter was being used at this time on another person. We at Lakeashtontalk give our sincere sympathy to his wife Joann. May you find comfort in knowing that you have friends to support you at this time of sadness.
Joe Hunter
I ask everyone out there if they knew what "Do Nothing" Joe Hunter does at Lake Ashton as the director. Just as I thought, no one knew. I have not receive any replies to this question. As far as I know, he raises his right hand at the coffee meetings.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Freddie Mac
AP - David Kellermann, the acting chief financial officer of mortgage giant Freddie Mac, was found dead at his home Wednesday morning in what police said was an apparent suicide.
These are the guys that was getting paid big bucks. Just like Joe Hunter.
These are the guys that was getting paid big bucks. Just like Joe Hunter.
Joe Hunter
I hope you people that play golf and come back to see that your home got broken into and all your valuables stolen and Joe Hunter never told you to make sure you lock you doors and put the alarm on that we have homes being broken into. No he will never tell you this, He just wants to introduce the new residence of Lake Ashton to the coffee meeting. You people are losers that voted to keep Joe Hunter as directer. You must be brain retarded. You need to be in a mental hospital. You still have not told me what he does as director besides accuses people of things they didn't do. Need I say more?
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Joe Hunter
A few months ago when Lake Ashton homes and cars were being broken into, Joe Hunter never told the residents that homes and cars were being broken into at the Monday morning coffee meetings it took one of the residents and me to tell the people. No crime ever happens here according to Joe Hunter. He only tells you this is Paradise. "Do Nothing" Joe Hunter and he still has followers here at Lake Ashton. What does he do for $100,000 yearly in salary? Raise his right hand at the Monday morning coffee meeting. Please tell me! If you can't tell me than I guess he does nothing. I might add that many communities have no director. lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com
Miami-Dade shut off water to residents
Article Courtesy of The Miami Herald
By Monica Hatcher
Published April 18, 2009
The cash shortage plaguing South Florida's foreclosure-ridden condominiums reached a crisis at the Mirassou Condominium in Northwest Miami-Dade after the county shut off water to residents because the association failed to pay its water bill.
Miami-Dade Water and Sewer Department said Thursday that it turned off the water to the 310-unit building after the condo association failed to abide by three separate repayment plans over the last nine months. The association has an outstanding balance of $109,000, the department said.
"We've bent over backward to try to help them out,'' said Frank Calderon, a spokesman for the department. "It's not fair to other rate-payers when somebody owes that kind of amount. They end up footing the bill.''
As budget problems continue to worsen for many South Florida condo associations, the Mirassou's fate underscores the severe consequences communities face when too many unit owners enter foreclosure and stop paying association fees. Those fees, charged to all unit owners, pay for common expenses on everything from pest control to property insurance, water, pool service and garbage collection.
At the Mirassou, roughly a third of the units are bank-owned or in foreclosure. Calderon said the county finally turned off the water as a last resort on Tuesday, but residents allegedly tampered with the meter to keep it running illegally another day. County employees visiting the property at 6175 NW 186th St. discovered the vandalism Wednesday and removed the meters.
Meanwhile, the county dispatched a team from the health department to instruct residents about maintaining healthy practices, including how to get by with unflushable toilets.
Edward Acle, a Miami attorney who is assisting the condo's management company in resolving the matter, said employees from the company as well as unit owners met with Miami-Dade County Commissioner Barbara Jordan Thursday to see what could be done. The Mirassou is in her district.
"People have been talking about the day when this would come and that day is here,'' Acle said, referring to predictions that condos would face serious operational issues because of high foreclosure rates. "South Florida is the point of the spear in this crisis.''
Calderon said this was the first time in recent memory the county had to shut the water off to a complex as large as Mirassou. The water department said it is still willing to work with the association, which earlier this month bounced a check for $42,335.50.
While the association was able to come up with $16,000 Thursday, Calderon said it needed to make a minimum payment of $31,626 to get water restored.
"This is a terrible situation,'' said Jordan.
Meanwhile, Mirassou residents are forced to buy drinking water and shower at the homes of friends and family. Among them was Hermogenes Abad, 30, who bought a unit there two years ago. He said he was current on his home loan and ahead on his association fees.
"I honestly don't see how they can just cut the water on people who are making payments,'' Abad said.
Abad said he was confident the issue would be resolved, but if not, he would have no choice but to find a way out of his mortgage, since the county building department won't allow residents to occupy a building without water. "I'm going to have to try to get letters together from people saying this building is uninhabitable,'' he said.
By Monica Hatcher
Published April 18, 2009
The cash shortage plaguing South Florida's foreclosure-ridden condominiums reached a crisis at the Mirassou Condominium in Northwest Miami-Dade after the county shut off water to residents because the association failed to pay its water bill.
Miami-Dade Water and Sewer Department said Thursday that it turned off the water to the 310-unit building after the condo association failed to abide by three separate repayment plans over the last nine months. The association has an outstanding balance of $109,000, the department said.
"We've bent over backward to try to help them out,'' said Frank Calderon, a spokesman for the department. "It's not fair to other rate-payers when somebody owes that kind of amount. They end up footing the bill.''
As budget problems continue to worsen for many South Florida condo associations, the Mirassou's fate underscores the severe consequences communities face when too many unit owners enter foreclosure and stop paying association fees. Those fees, charged to all unit owners, pay for common expenses on everything from pest control to property insurance, water, pool service and garbage collection.
At the Mirassou, roughly a third of the units are bank-owned or in foreclosure. Calderon said the county finally turned off the water as a last resort on Tuesday, but residents allegedly tampered with the meter to keep it running illegally another day. County employees visiting the property at 6175 NW 186th St. discovered the vandalism Wednesday and removed the meters.
Meanwhile, the county dispatched a team from the health department to instruct residents about maintaining healthy practices, including how to get by with unflushable toilets.
Edward Acle, a Miami attorney who is assisting the condo's management company in resolving the matter, said employees from the company as well as unit owners met with Miami-Dade County Commissioner Barbara Jordan Thursday to see what could be done. The Mirassou is in her district.
"People have been talking about the day when this would come and that day is here,'' Acle said, referring to predictions that condos would face serious operational issues because of high foreclosure rates. "South Florida is the point of the spear in this crisis.''
Calderon said this was the first time in recent memory the county had to shut the water off to a complex as large as Mirassou. The water department said it is still willing to work with the association, which earlier this month bounced a check for $42,335.50.
While the association was able to come up with $16,000 Thursday, Calderon said it needed to make a minimum payment of $31,626 to get water restored.
"This is a terrible situation,'' said Jordan.
Meanwhile, Mirassou residents are forced to buy drinking water and shower at the homes of friends and family. Among them was Hermogenes Abad, 30, who bought a unit there two years ago. He said he was current on his home loan and ahead on his association fees.
"I honestly don't see how they can just cut the water on people who are making payments,'' Abad said.
Abad said he was confident the issue would be resolved, but if not, he would have no choice but to find a way out of his mortgage, since the county building department won't allow residents to occupy a building without water. "I'm going to have to try to get letters together from people saying this building is uninhabitable,'' he said.
$1 million missing from HOA
Article Courtesy of The Charlotte Sun
By STEVE REILLY
Published April 21, 2009
PORT CHARLOTTE -- Charlotte Square condominium residents still don't know where they stand, but it looks like close to a $1 million may be missing from their various associations' accounts.
The money was discovered missing more than eight months ago. Police are investigating a former Star Hospitality manager of possibly inappropriately co-mingling individual associations' funds, cashing, writing and depositing checks for the associations that make up the condominium complex.
No charges have been filed.
Star Hospitality remains Charlotte Square's condominium management company. A Star Hospitality employee at Charlotte Square did not want to comment Monday
Still investigating
According to a sheriff's incident report, dated Sept. 10, 2008, Chelsea House association representatives told Charlotte County Sheriff's detectives that its June and August bank statements weren't balancing.
Charlotte County Sheriff's Public Information Officer Bob Carpenter described the investigation as becoming "huge," highly technical and complex since the original complaint was filed.
"It's one of the (Economic Crime Unit's) most complicated cases," Carpenter said Monday. "They've had (a full-time investigator) on this since the beginning."
Charlotte Square is made up of nine individual buildings -- which are called houses. Each of its houses has its own association, but the residents also have a master executive association governing board, made up of representatives of each house.
Prior to the discovery of the missing funds, the associations boards elected not to have annual independent audits.
Since the beginning, residents, most of whom are in their 80s, have been advised not to talk to the press or make any other public statements -- first by the associations' insurance company, Great American Insurance Company, in an e-mail to the executive board and then by their association attorneys.
"A lot of the people are elderly and we don't want them to say anything defamatory," said Michael R. Whitt, the Becker & Poliakoff attorney representing Charlotte Square. "We need to make sure there is one voice in the press."
Residents paid a special $95 assessment for a forensic audit and other legal expenses. Whitt said that audit of a year's worth of records is nearly completed. While he hesitated to quote any exact losses, Whitt did say close to $1 million may be missing from associations' coffers. The amounts vary from house to house.
"We will be getting that information to law enforcement," Whitt said.
By the end of this month or next month, Becker & Poliakoff may be ready to file civil suits.
Call for concern
By STEVE REILLY
Published April 21, 2009
PORT CHARLOTTE -- Charlotte Square condominium residents still don't know where they stand, but it looks like close to a $1 million may be missing from their various associations' accounts.
The money was discovered missing more than eight months ago. Police are investigating a former Star Hospitality manager of possibly inappropriately co-mingling individual associations' funds, cashing, writing and depositing checks for the associations that make up the condominium complex.
No charges have been filed.
Star Hospitality remains Charlotte Square's condominium management company. A Star Hospitality employee at Charlotte Square did not want to comment Monday
Still investigating
According to a sheriff's incident report, dated Sept. 10, 2008, Chelsea House association representatives told Charlotte County Sheriff's detectives that its June and August bank statements weren't balancing.
Charlotte County Sheriff's Public Information Officer Bob Carpenter described the investigation as becoming "huge," highly technical and complex since the original complaint was filed.
"It's one of the (Economic Crime Unit's) most complicated cases," Carpenter said Monday. "They've had (a full-time investigator) on this since the beginning."
Charlotte Square is made up of nine individual buildings -- which are called houses. Each of its houses has its own association, but the residents also have a master executive association governing board, made up of representatives of each house.
Prior to the discovery of the missing funds, the associations boards elected not to have annual independent audits.
Since the beginning, residents, most of whom are in their 80s, have been advised not to talk to the press or make any other public statements -- first by the associations' insurance company, Great American Insurance Company, in an e-mail to the executive board and then by their association attorneys.
"A lot of the people are elderly and we don't want them to say anything defamatory," said Michael R. Whitt, the Becker & Poliakoff attorney representing Charlotte Square. "We need to make sure there is one voice in the press."
Residents paid a special $95 assessment for a forensic audit and other legal expenses. Whitt said that audit of a year's worth of records is nearly completed. While he hesitated to quote any exact losses, Whitt did say close to $1 million may be missing from associations' coffers. The amounts vary from house to house.
"We will be getting that information to law enforcement," Whitt said.
By the end of this month or next month, Becker & Poliakoff may be ready to file civil suits.
Call for concern
Charlotte Square
Charlotte Square still sorting out fiscal fiasco
April 21, 2009
Dear Governor Charlie Crist, Dear Lt. Governor Jeff Kottkamp, Dear Senators and State Representatives,
while the so-called HOUSE LEADERSHIP is hell-bent to turn the Sunshine State into the State of Despair, many of our citizens living in community associations are fighting for financial survival. Many associations don't have sufficient funds to pay their daily bills due to foreclosed upon or empty homes, others are suffering from the loss of money caused by embezzlement and many other scams!
If you are interested in the misery of owners living in community associations please read this article:
Charlotte Square still sorting out fiscal fiasco at:
http://www.ccfj.net/condoCharlotteSquarefiasco.html
You will quickly understand why CALL, the lobbying group of the law firm of Becker&Poliakoff, is against specialized investigators dealing with financial crimes in our associations. These attorneys are making a lot of money from the misery of senior citizens!
April 21, 2009
Dear Governor Charlie Crist, Dear Lt. Governor Jeff Kottkamp, Dear Senators and State Representatives,
while the so-called HOUSE LEADERSHIP is hell-bent to turn the Sunshine State into the State of Despair, many of our citizens living in community associations are fighting for financial survival. Many associations don't have sufficient funds to pay their daily bills due to foreclosed upon or empty homes, others are suffering from the loss of money caused by embezzlement and many other scams!
If you are interested in the misery of owners living in community associations please read this article:
Charlotte Square still sorting out fiscal fiasco at:
http://www.ccfj.net/condoCharlotteSquarefiasco.html
You will quickly understand why CALL, the lobbying group of the law firm of Becker&Poliakoff, is against specialized investigators dealing with financial crimes in our associations. These attorneys are making a lot of money from the misery of senior citizens!
Voter response
I voted No on your survey. Joe is a good community director and is willing to do whatever he can to please the residents, while at the same time keeping it FAIR for everyone. He has done more for residents than you can begin to know or care to learn about.
Do you volunteer at Give Kids the World? They need volunteers far more than they need the money. Give of your time and get over the fact that you would have to pay for use of the ballroom.
Anna
My reply to Anna
Yes, many times, They need money more than volunteers who go there and have a free breakfast. They can't pay their bills and run Give Kids The World on volunteers. I just don't know where you get your information? Don't you enjoy these shows at lake Ashton and don't you feel that Lake Ashton should sponsor this charity show? How cheap can this community be? Great entertainment down the drain. How much money have you given? None, right. Stay home and watch TV and feed your mouth. I guess this Lake Ashton Talk reader has not read how much Joe has help me. He has accuse 3 residents of wrong doing and they were not in the area. Ed
Do you volunteer at Give Kids the World? They need volunteers far more than they need the money. Give of your time and get over the fact that you would have to pay for use of the ballroom.
Anna
My reply to Anna
Yes, many times, They need money more than volunteers who go there and have a free breakfast. They can't pay their bills and run Give Kids The World on volunteers. I just don't know where you get your information? Don't you enjoy these shows at lake Ashton and don't you feel that Lake Ashton should sponsor this charity show? How cheap can this community be? Great entertainment down the drain. How much money have you given? None, right. Stay home and watch TV and feed your mouth. I guess this Lake Ashton Talk reader has not read how much Joe has help me. He has accuse 3 residents of wrong doing and they were not in the area. Ed
Monday, April 20, 2009
Joe Hunter
Joe hunter was seen using the computers in the library. WHY, He has his own computer at his desk. It seems he is voting on all the computers on the question should he be replaced. Joe, you can fool the people some of the time but not all the time. You got caught Joe, shame on you.
To All No Voters
All you voters that feel "Do Nothing" Joe Hunter who gets paid over $100,000 plus a year, Salary plus bonus, should stay on as director, please e-mail me at lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com and tell me why we need him if you can? You must tell me why so I can post your answer on this web site.
seven wonders of the world
If you wish to see the 7 wonders of the world, I will E-mail them to you. They are not what you think. lakeashtontalk.com
lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com
NEWS WANTED ON ALL FRONTS. E-MAIL LAKEASHTONTALK AT lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com
HOMES
In 2007 there was 138 resale homes for sale here at Lake Ashton, In 2009 there are now 60 homes for sale. Lots of people just don't want to sell their home because the home is worth much less than what they paid for it. There are about 45 homes and 15 RV homes for sale here at Lake Ashton. The people that are buying a RV home drive in with their $500,000 to $1,000,000 Mobile home and want a new one. They just don't want someones else used home.
Last year 42 homes was sold here at Lake Ashton, this year so far 20 homes has been sold. Homes that were bought at $300,000 with $40,000 in improvements are now being sold at $175,000. A big loss to the buyer.
How is the market doing? Prices are still going down slowly but more people are buying. Banks interest is now at 4 1/2%
Last year 42 homes was sold here at Lake Ashton, this year so far 20 homes has been sold. Homes that were bought at $300,000 with $40,000 in improvements are now being sold at $175,000. A big loss to the buyer.
How is the market doing? Prices are still going down slowly but more people are buying. Banks interest is now at 4 1/2%
Forecloses
There are 10 forecloses in Lake Ashton which means that someone must pay the taxes, CDD fees, MX, Lawn care, and maintenance. It all comes down to this. The residents of Lake Ashton must pay these fees. The banks are in no way obligated to pay the MX, Lawn care, CDD and Maintenance Fees. These fees will be added to your upcoming cost of fees. The bank in the meantime in addition to the HOA will place their lean on this property. Yes your maintainace cost are going up big time.
The bank and the HOA will place a lean on this property but most of the time banks must pay the lean. Buyers will always pay a lower price than the balance of the home. This is why banks are in big trouble and residents are required to pay the additional cost of fees.
The sales office should tell the people all the cost and fees of buying these home, but they do not. Joe Hunter don't care. After you buy the home you are in for a big surprise.
I might add that the water has been shut off by the city so now the lawn will turn brown and die. The HOA will be looking into this I hope. More fees for the residents.
The bank and the HOA will place a lean on this property but most of the time banks must pay the lean. Buyers will always pay a lower price than the balance of the home. This is why banks are in big trouble and residents are required to pay the additional cost of fees.
The sales office should tell the people all the cost and fees of buying these home, but they do not. Joe Hunter don't care. After you buy the home you are in for a big surprise.
I might add that the water has been shut off by the city so now the lawn will turn brown and die. The HOA will be looking into this I hope. More fees for the residents.
Joe Hunter
Last month Joe Hunter said before the CDD committee to put on any type of show on stage would take away the audience from the entertainment series. He is more concern about making money for the developer, as if he doesn't have enough, than helping parents seeing their children before they die to see Disney world. This guy has no love for anyone but his boss. This guy does nothing to help anyone in need of help. There are 10 home foreclose in Lake Ashton and the sales office never tells you about the high taxes. Joe Hunter knows this and will not interfere with sales. The Broadway Memories and Melodies show was a smashing success. Is he going to complain about this show too? Is Lake Ashton Management too cheap to sponsor shows that donate money to Give Kids The World? How cheap can you get? Pack your bags Joe and move on.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Joe Hunter
Joe Hunter sure knows how to get on your back. He accuse me of taking water from the small pond next to my house by letter. I guess this must be Holy Water. He accuse me of placing my business card on people golf carts and ban me from using the facilities for one week when in fact I was in Maine at the time. He gave me hell for leaving my small rubber boat in Lake Ashton over night. I did not know he owns the Lake. He and Margot Stevens got Jack Van Sickle, now Mayor of Lake Wales to get the police over my house because they thought I had a AK-47. He also accuse me of bad conduct against Eddie Frye because I had my window broken by a cheap gofer who run away without paying for the window damage. I suggest that the gofers put money in a broken window fund. If Gofers can afford $3500 a year to play golf they should be able to kick in a few dollars for the run away cheap gofers who gives the other gofers a bad name. I guess he did not like this idea. I am still in his gun sight and it is just a matter of time I will receive another letter from the community dictator. Now you know the rest of the story. If you complain about Lake Ashton, you will received a welcome letter. Edmund King
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