ASHTON GRILL CHEF ARRESTED

MIGUEL SUAZO WAS ARRESTED TODAY AT THE ASHTON GRILL FOR BEATING AN EGG' He posted bond and was placed on 30 probation.

two female parrots,

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, But they only know to say one thing.' 'What do they say?' the priest asked. They say, 'Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?' 'That's obscene!' the priest exclaimed, Then he thought for a moment..... 'You know,' he said, 'I may have a solution to your problem. I havetwo male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible... Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter. My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying... That phrase... In no time.' 'Thank you,' the woman responded, 'this may very well be the solution.' The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house.... As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying... Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them... After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?' There was stunned silence... Shocked, One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and says, 'Put the beads away, Frank, our prayers have been answered!

: A Rare Occurrence

There was a knock on the door this morning.

I opened it to find a young man standing there who said: "I'm a Jehovah's Witness."

I said "Come in and sit down, what do you want to talk about?"

e said, "Beats the hell out of me, I've never gotten this far before."

Send mail to

lakeashtontalk@yahoo.com

Talked with the investigation unit on Friday.

There will be a arrest very soon. No later than March. The hammer will fall.

89.000 hits today, Saturday Feb 24, 2011 Thank you for your support

BINGO PAUL PONTIOUS

This community is the home of many people that are completely brainless and have no idea on how to think or how to act. ALL MONEY MUST GO TO CHARITY. HOW SIMPLE IS THIS?
Paul never paid Income taxes
Bought over a thousand T shirts
Went out to dinner with the Bingo players money.
Filled up his car with gas
Stuff his refig with food
Hired a bus to take people out to dinner.
He is still controlling Bingo.
His wife is still the bookkeeper
He still controls Bingo
He still has a bank account

BINGO PAUL PONTIOUS page 7 of 21

QUESTIONS WERE ALL REMOVED BECAUSE THEY WERE FIXED BY BINGO PAUL.

He doesn't have enough T Shirts so he goes out and buy more, $218.00 more.

He is renting the ballroom but what is this? Ballroom Drapes $963.00

New Camera for @ $577.15 Seems like a lot of money for a camera!

Cleaning chairs in ballroom $601.75. He is renting the ballroom!

Repair the ballroom floor $2500.00 He is renting the ballroom!

More T shirts $265.50 Doesn't he have enough or is someone walking away with T Shirts

Gets his Bingo License on Oct 28, 2008 $100.00 Does he read it??

Manny's chop house $650.00 This money should have gone to charity not in his big month.

BAN BINGO. DON'T SUPPORT BINGO PAUL UNTIL HE QUITS

BINGO PAUL PONTIOUS page 7 of 21 Bank Statement's that he did not want you to see. Now you know why.

charged with necrophilia

The Judge and the Accused…!

A man was brought before the judge and charged with necrophilia

(Making love to a dead person)

The judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a disgusting, immoral thing.

Just give me one good reason why I shouldn’t lock you up

And throw away the jail keys in the toilet?"

The man replied,

"I'll give you THREE good reasons:
1. It’s None Of Your Damn Business
2. She Was My Wife; And...
3. I Didn't Know She Was Dead.

She Always Acted That Way"

Canada

As you watch this, you will be proud of to be a citizen of our great Canadian nation.

http://www.wimp.com/explainscanada/

CHECK OUT THIS OLD PARKING INVENTION

Paul Pontious

Paul Pontious is so nice to everyone. He walks on water. Steals money from Bingo Players, Doesn't pay his taxes. What a hell of a nice guy. He walks in the pool room and calls me an idiot in front of 30 players last year. Hey Paul, what are you???????? Mr Right?????

Paul Pontious letter to Dave Ross (click on letter to enlarge it.)

Roy Rogers

Date: Wed, 23 Feb 2011 10:38:50 -0500
>
I had read somewhere that when the museum was no longer profitable he told his kids to sell everything..and it looks like they did.
>
> This is a shame..but I guess it had to be....the generation that knew this is slowly fading..
>
> The Roy Rogers Museum has closed its doors forever. Here is a partial listing of some of the items that were sold at auction.
>
> Roy 's 1964 Bonneville sold for $254,500, it was estimated to sell between 100 and 150 thousand dollars.
>
> His script book from the January 14,1953 episode of This Is Your Life sold for $10,000 (est. $800-$1,000)
>
> A collection of signed baseballs (Pete Rose, Duke Snyder and other greats) sold for $3,750
>
> A collection of signed bats (Yogi Berra, Enos Slaughter, Bob Feller, and others) sold for $2,750.
>
> Trigger's saddle and bridle sold for $386,500 (est. 100-150 K)
>
> One of many of Roy 's shirts sold for $16,250 and one of his many cowboy hats sold for $17,500.
>
> One set of boot spurs sold for $10,625. (He never used a set of spurs on Trigger.)
>
> A life size shooting gallery sold for $27,500.
>
> Various chandeliers sold from $6,875 to $20,000. They are unique and artistic in their western style.
>
> A signed photograph by Don Larsen taken during his perfect game in the world series against the Dodgers on Oct. 8, 1953, along with a signed baseball to Roy from Don, sold for $2,500
>
> Two fabulous limited edition BB guns in their original boxes with numerous photos of Roy, Dale, Gabby, and Pat sold for $3,750.
>
> A collection of memorabilia from his shows entertaining the troops in Vietnam sold for $938. I never knew he was there. His flight jacket sold for $7,500.
>
> His set of dinner ware plates and silverware sold for $11,875. The Bible they used at the dinner table every night sold for $8,750.
>
> One of several of his guitars sold for $27,500.
>
> Nellybelle sold for $116,500.
>
>A fabulous painting of Roy , Dale, Pat, Buttermilk, Trigger, and Bullet sold for $10,625.
>
> One of several sets of movie posters sold for $18,750.
>
> A black and white photograph of Gene Autry with a touching inscription from Gene to Roy sold for $17,500.
>
> A Republic Productions Poster bearing many autographs of the people that played in Roy 's movies sold for $11,875.
>
> Dale's horse, Buttermilk (whose history is very interesting) sold below the presale estimate for $25,000. (est. 30-40 K)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Bullet sold for $35,000 (est. 10-15 K). He was their real pet.
>
> Dale's parade saddle, estimated to sell between 20-30 K, sold for $104,500.
>
> One of many pairs of Roy's boots sold for $21,250.
>
> Trigger sold for $266,500.
>
>Do you remember the 1938 movie The Adventures of Robinhood with Errol Flynn and Olivia de Havilland? Well Olivia rode Trigger in that movie. Trigger was bred on a farm co-owned by Bing Crosby. Roy bought Trigger on a time payment plan for $2,500. Roy and Trigger made 188 movies together. Trigger even out did Bob Hope by winning an Oscar in the movie Son of Paleface in 1953.
>
> It is extremely sad to see this era lost forever. Despite the fact that Gene and Roy 's movies, as well as those of other great characters, can be bought or rented for viewing, today's kids would rather spend their time playing video games. Today it takes a very special pair of parents to raise their kids with the right values and morals. These were the great heroes of our childhood, and they did teach us right from wrong, and how to have and show respect for each other and the animals that share this earth.
>
> You and I were born at the right time. We were able to grow up with these great people even if we never met them. In their own way they taught us patriotism and honor, we learned that lying and cheating were bad, and sex wasn't as important as love. We learned how to suffer through disappointment and failure and work through it. Our lives were drug free.
>
> So it's good-bye to Roy and Dale, Gene and Hoppy, The Lone Ranger and Tonto. Farewell to Sky King and Superman and Sgt. Friday. Thanks to Capt. Kangaroo, Mr. Rogers and Capt. Noah and all those people whose lives touched ours, and made them better.
>
> It was a great ride through childhood.
>
> THOSE WERE THE DAYS, MY FRIENDS!
>
>A time in history, never to be seen again, but what a ride it was...HAPPY TRAILS TO YOU!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> = 7 Images | View Slideshow | Download Selected | Download

image001.jpg (11KB)	image002.jpg (16KB)	image003.jpg (33KB)
image004.jpg (13KB)	image005.jpg (15KB)	image006.jpg (21KB)

The Village Thief Paul Pontious

Well I might be the village idiot but I am not the Village Thief that stole money from the Bingo players and enjoy it at the restaurants and filled up his Gas tank and ice box and enjoy hundreds of Bingo Shirts. Resign now from the HOA, sell your home and get out. You have downgraded this community and gave it a bad name. We don't need people like you around. For what?

How to change your fan belt

Meeting on Feb11, 2011

Please remember that at this meeting, Inspector Obitz clearly said that there were a number of violations and crimes made at Bingo and that there were too many people involved. It would be in the best interest of the community to drop the investigation. He admitted that there were violations and crimes made. We do have a recording of the meeting even through you never had the minutes done by the HOA.

This investigation has not been halted but is still being investigated by the Feds, the state and the authorities. This investigation is just like watergate. It seems that the Lake Wales police Chief Gillis was the one that called in the FBI on the missing money and soon afterward he was fired by none other than the mayor of Lake Wales, Jack Van Sickle. It was said in the Ledger that he quit, this was not true. Please note that when Jack was on the Bingo committee he quickly paid off his mortgage on his home. This investigation is in its full swing and people will be shocked at what they will find out. Yes the hammer will drop not only on one person but on quite a few. Good luck boys. Do your stuff.

----- Forwarded Message ----
From: Paul Pontious
To: Lake Ashton
Sent: Thu, February 17, 2011 4:03:52 PM
Subject: Re: Bingo Bank Records

-

This is obviously written by the Village Idiot, Ed King. You can tell by the wonderful grammar used in this long saga. Ed would not know how to read a bank statement let alone figure out howmoney was spent or mis-spent. You have to give him credit though, he is an idiot at all times and associates with people who also are idiots. I have had special education kids in cl;ass much brighter that Idiot Ed. However, to his credit he always consistently shows just exactly how dumb he really is. I never saw anyone who consistently goes on the Internet and proves week after week that his level of intelligence never changes. Once stupid, always stupid/ This is a E-Mail written by By a Highly Educated person call Bingo Paul Pontious, he sure knows how to spell and uses highly supplicated words. cl;ass what word is this? Look at all the miss spellings! Sticks the words together and just doesn't get the picture. This guy thinks I am making up the bank statements. Its all fake. This guy needs his head examine. The hammer is going to fall soon and you Paul Pontious will be looking out of bars and also paying a very large fine and unpaid taxes. You can't walk on water you idiot, you will sink. This guy thinks he's GOD. What is wrong with this guy?????

>
> >> How to arrest a terrorist
> >>
> >> The correct way to arrest a terrorist. I just love the way
> >> the police in Spain deal with this guy! If this happened
> >> in the USA , the cops would all be suspended and fired.
> >> The terrorist would get a lawyer, a new motorcycle,
> >> $500,000 compensation
> >>
> >> This incident took place in Spain . Apparently the
> >> Spanish police agreed to placate a 'bank hostage'
> >> situation by allowing the radical to 'escape'
> >> uninhibited. He was allowed to walk out of the
> >> bank in the company of 2 hostages. The police
> >> provided him with a motorcycle and free access
> >> to the motorcycle. Then, leaving the hostages
> >> behind, he was permitted to ride away down a
> >> clear roadway to make his 'escape.' This whole
> >> incident, shown on CBS television, complete with
> >> news reporting in English, can be seen on this
> >> 55-second video clip.

chickens

Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch standard 4 pound dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity.

The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

British engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains.

Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the British engineers.

When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow.

The horrified Brits sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the US scientists for suggestions.

NASA responded with a one-line memo --

"Defrost the chicken." (True Story)

Yosemite

Yosemite Phenomenon - Frazil Ice

Really awesome to watch! Take a few minutes and be amazed! Scroll down...

The amazing grandeur and power of mother nature...........

YOSEMITE'S FRAZIL ICE
It is hard to imagine that Yosemite is only 60 miles from Fresno -- where it
never ever snows and rarely gets below 32 F in the dead of winter.
This is an incredible video! It only happens in March and April. I
have never seen a creek come to a complete stop like this before and start up
again s omeplace else.
It's like a lava flow. Turn on your sound. Now just enjoy
........................


http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=9V9p4mFEYXc&vq=medium#t=15

HAHOC COMMITTEE HAS TO DEAL WITH ...............

The Porcupine


It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold.



The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together. They were covered and protected, but the quills of each wounded the closest companion. After a while, they decided to distance themselves, and they began to die, alone and frozen.

So, they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth. Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to live with the little wounds that were caused by their close relationships because the most important part was the heat that came from the others. They were able to survive..

The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but the one that forms when individuals learn to live with the imperfections and admire the good qualities of others.

The Moral of the story:

LEARN TO DEAL WITH THE PRICKS IN YOUR LIFE.

extra SUVs are in Presidential or VIP motorcades

---

Have you ever wondered what all those extra SUVs are in Presidential or VIP motorcades as seen at Arlington? You know, the ones with severely tinted windows. The SUV's that no one gets in or out of?

Well, wonder no more. They have 6 barreled 7.62 mm mini Gatling guns.
They Fire over 4,000 rounds per minute The wipers need to be run to remove spent casings when the weapon is firing. This video is from the company that makes the rigs. The vehicle is also armor plated.

Listen to this baby go off.

Have Sound ON.

Muslim Doll

The latest toy has hit the shops -- a talking Muslim doll.


Nobody knows what the hell it says,

because no one has the balls to pull the cord.

Joseph Ferriera

Yesterday Feb 19, 2011 smiley Joe was at the Southeast Eatery in Winter Haven. Does this guy ever smiles? He is stone face every time I see him. This is the same GUY THAT GOES BY MY HOME AND CALLS ME AN IDIOT. I did call the police on him. What is he? GOD This is the same guy that helped Bingo Paul enjoy Dinners at a high price restaurants. Money that should have gone to charity, instead goes to feed his big fat month. Stealing money from charity and he himself goes to give kids the world and enjoys a free breakfast. He will do anything for a free meal and a cheap meal. Joe, you should be ashamed of yourself. How low can you go? Pick up trash alone the side of the road, yes, another free meal. Where ever there is a free meal, you will see Smiley Joe. To steal money from charity is something that I can't deal with.